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SH!T FAMILY


Guest RCOOTE

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Guest RCOOTE

>For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We

>find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack

>Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in

>an intellectual way.

>

>Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer

>magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They

>had one son, Jack.

>

>In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple

>produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull

>Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

>

>Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a

>high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt

>divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids

>were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was

>then known as Noe Schitt

>Sherlock.

>

>Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with

>a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six

>children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout

>childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual

>ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the

>Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd

>and Horse.

>

>Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently

>returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

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